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Sunday, June 23, 2013

"Men, shopping, and negotiations..." 'Deborah Morel'


Guest-blogger Deborah Morel  is a Human and Judicial rights advocate. One of her favorite quotes close
to heart is, "The dead cannot cry out for justice; it is a duty of the living to do this for them."
Lois McMaster Bujold

Today Deborah talks about the difference between men and woman 
when it comes  to shopping... Enjoy!

Men, shopping, and negotiations

For a good part of my life, I continued to gain employment in the retail industry, and all the while employed in law enforcement, as well. I found working in the retail industry helped to balance out my professional life--a life in which reporting to duty each day as a lawmaker, at times, brought challenges, losses, and in the worst cases, tragedies. Having for years been offered runway work, and instructing at a finish school and modeling agency, being employed in retail fashion provided an avenue to be creative.

I have made years of observations of "men and shopping." Having worked retail in the men's department of several stores, and over these years, I came to the conclusion that shopping for many men is like hunting. Men--more often than not--enter the store, they scan the "field" (store), find their target, aim, and before you know it, this male customer is at the register ready to check--out, with a shirt, shorts, or slacks to purchase--slung over their shoulder....well, like the "kill."  Next? Pay for the item. The "trophy" is dressed (wrapped in tissue and placed in a bag). Leave the store. Done.

For some women, though, shopping often has a different meaning. It can be a "social outing," where there are numbers of females together shopping. This shopping adventure can be an all day event. There seems to often be a great deal of thought--and advice seeking--put into these excursions.

A man, who is willing to accompany his wife or girlfriend, while she shops, I have said is a keeper. This type of man shows patience, understanding, will carry the shopping bags, and give an opinion when asked. On a busy day, in most women's department stores, chairs are lined-up with men patiently sitting and waiting. I refer to this area as the "maternity ward." As the day becomes the afternoon, I have noticed that many men waiting...and waiting, begin to get what I call the "thousand mile stare."

Shopping for me is not an outing; it is a time to be creative--to put thought into my purchase, considering fashion, quality, and economics. With this, I need time to concentrate, and consider--to mix, match, combine, choose fabrics, colors, and textures. Most of the females in my family, and friends, enjoy endurance shopping. At times, this means shopping until the stores close at 11:00 pm in Waikiki.

On one such evening, just about 9:30 pm, I would find myself sitting in the line-up with 5 men who had accompanied their wife or girlfriend in these ladies' shopping trip to a 3 story, high end, lingerie store. And, there we all sat...with the thousand mile stare, holding shopping bags, waiting patiently. I looked at these men, and announced (no need to hold back), "This store doesn't need one more sports bra; what this store needs is a sport bar."


P.S.
There was a specialty shop I managed in historic Beale Street, Memphis, TN, for about 1.5 years, and until I moved to Delaware for grad studies. The name of the shop was originally Beale Street Nostalgia. The developer, and marketing director, of  Beale Street were looking for a  new name for the shop. I suggested "Strange Cargo," and the store became known as Strange Cargo in 1998, and this name has remained since.

Beale Street is the heart of Blue's music in Memphis. I was young, single, and loved this job. We worked until 2:00 am most nights. There was often live music organized, and performing in the streets; traffic would be blocked from traveling the 3 blocks. Lots of home cooking, some barbecuing on the roof tops of some buildings. There were always special music  affairs and holiday events. People from around the world came to Beale Street...it was a place musicians like BB King and Elvis Presley would be found. We had a good time. Aloha, Deborah Morel

Check out the link to the store Deborah named,Strange Cargo. Pretty cool!
http://www.yelp.com/biz/strange-cargo-memphis

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