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Thursday, October 30, 2014

"A Nun at Hooters..." 'Robert Bitos Gandia' (Source)




Guest-blogger,Robert Bitos Gandia.
Robert is an avid cook (ono gandule rice) and always laughing!!
He works at Syngenta as a Research Associate.

Robert lives in Kekaha on Kauai's west-side and loves football!!


A Nun at Hooters

A nun, badly needing to use the restroom, walked into a local Hooters restaurant.

The place was hopping with music and loud conversation and every once in a while 'the lights would turn off.'
Each time the lights would go out, the place would erupt into cheers.
However, when the revelers saw the nun, the room went dead silent.
She walked up to the bartender, and asked, 'May I please use the restroom?

The bartender replied, 'OK, but I should warn you that there is a statue of a naked man in there wearing only a fig leaf.'

'Well, in that case, I'll just look the other way,' said the nun.
So the bartender showed the nun to the back of the restaurant.

After a few minutes, she came back out, and the whole place stopped just long enough to give the nun a loud round of applause. !

She went to the bartender and said, 'Sir, I don't understand. Why did they applaud for me just because I went to the restroom?'

'Well, now they know you're one of us,' said the bartender, 'Would you like a drink?'
'No thank you, but, I still don't understand,' said the puzzled nun.

'YOU SEE,' laughed the bartender, 'EVERY TIME SOMEONE LIFTS THE FIG LEAF ON THAT STATUE, THE LIGHTS GO OUT'.



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Monday, October 27, 2014

"To vote or not to vote, that is the question..." (Kimo's world #40)

James “Kimo” Rosen is a retired professional photographer living in Kapa'a
 with his best friend Obama Da Dog, Rosen also blogs as a hobby...
Don't forget to vote!
 I endorse Bernard Carvalho Jr.
for mayor of Kauai!

Photo above,
Kaua'i Mayor Bernard Carvalho Jr.

Obama da Dog and James "Kimo" Rosen

Kimo's world #40

To vote or not to vote, that is the question

To vote or not to vote, that is the question.

Does it really matter who wins an election?

Will your life change or be any different depending whose in office?

I am betting most of our lives would not be any different with whom ever happens to win an election?

Incumbents preach experience and new comers preach change. Once in office the main objective is to be re-elected.

Politics is a nasty game, it takes a person with thick skin and a narcissistic personality to run for office. People that love seeing their name in print. People who think their poop doesn't stink and people who think they are GOD'S gift to the world.

Wow, maybe I need to be a politician!?




Does Kaua'i rock or what?
Mayor Bernard Carvalho in yellow polo shirt along with
State representative Derek Kawakami in the blue aloha shirt
dancing this past June at the 'Taste of Hawai'i...'
P.S.
Check out my YouTube video of Mayor Carvalho and state representative Derek Kawakami dancing! If you live on Kaua'i
please vote for both these men! 

My people, the Jewish people would refer to both these men as mensch, which means "a person of integrity and honor." Very hard to find this type of person in politics...
Good luck and G-d bless my friends Bernard Carvalho and Derek Kawakami!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-l0DGUp0nKQ


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Thursday, October 23, 2014

"A phone call to the hospital..." 'Robert Bitos gandia (Source)




Guest-blogger,Robert Bitos Gandia.
Robert is an avid cook (ono gandule rice) and always laughing!!
He works at Syngenta as a Research Associate.

Robert lives in Kekaha on Kauai's west-side and loves football!!

A phone call to the hospital

A sweet old lady telephoned St. Joseph 's Hospital. She timidly asked, "Is it possible to speak to someone who can tell me how a patient is doing?"

The operator said, "I'll be glad to help, dear. What's the name and room number of the patient?"
The old lady in her weak, tremulous voice said, "Norma Findlay, Room 302."

The operator replied, "Let me put you on hold while I check with the nurse's station for that room."

After a few minutes, the operator returned to the phone and said, "I have good news. Her nurse just told me that Norma is doing well. Her blood pressure is fine; her blood work just came back normal, and her physician, Dr. Cohen, has scheduled her to be discharged tomorrow."

The old lady said, "Thank you. That's wonderful. I was so worried. God bless you for the good news."
The operator replied, "You're more than welcome. Is Norma your daughter?"

The old lady said, "No, I'm Norma Findlay in Room 302. No one tells me anything"!





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Wednesday, October 22, 2014

"Fundamentalists are the problem..." 'Bettejo Dux' (Classic Wednesday)


Bettejo Dux has lived on the cosmic Garden Island of Kaua'i for over 40 years...
Bettejo is the author of the famed novellas "The Scam."
and recently published  "Children of Extinction..." 
Both books available on www.amazon.com

Fundamentalists are the problem

I think the problem lies with the fundamentalists in either of the three major religions: Christian, Muslim, Jews. 

I think it’s rather condescending of many  to say “We should love Muslims. Most of them really are nice people.”

As a devout nonbeliever I could respond, “Most Christians are really nice people.” “Most Jews are really nice people.” “Most Muslims are really nice people.” 

However, every fundamentalist I’ve ever come into contact with was hateful.

 I think you have a duty to your Gods to “clean your own house” before you start indulging in ad hominem. Remember, we are in the Middle East, their house, murdering innocent  men, women and children. As a devout nonbeliever I do not find this very loving. 


P.S.
Check out this unbelievable 96 year young Yoga instructor YouTube;
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u76yQEdflVM

P.S.S.
Don't forget to check out Bettejo's weekly TV show on Public access Hoike television;

Here is the video link:
http://vp.telvue.com/preview?id=T01393&video=205423

or http://www.hoike.org Arts and Entertainment

*SUPPORT LOCAL ACCESS!!*



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Monday, October 20, 2014

"Hurricanes and the weatherman that cried wolf...." Obama Da Dog' (Tongue-n-cheek) (Kimo's world #38)

People on Kaua'i start hoarding gas in preparation for a potential hurricane...

Special note. I wrote this article last week but wanted to wait until
the coast was cleared so people did not think I was the one who caused the hurricane...
(Inside joke)
Obama Da Dog lives in Kapa'a Kaua'i Hawai'i
 and is  a lifelong Hawai'ian resident. 

This blog is tongue -n-cheek.
Hurricanes and the weatherman that cried wolf.

 Breaking News! This  blog is tongue -n-cheek, comedy relief, so to speak.


Ratings are everything when it comes to TV shows, and the News is no  different than a sit-com, reality show or drama.

Advertisers pay big money for the popular shows and what's more popular than the weather men and woman talking about hurricanes? Hurricanes are huge for ratings.

That's the conspiracy of the hurricane, telling people to buy bottled water, batteries, rice, candles and spam when they know darn well no hurricane will arrive.

Gas stations, Grocery stores and the Big box stores love it too. The weatherman is telling everyone to stock  up on  emergency supplies.  Everyone has to have their bottled water,which is ludicrous in it's own right, just fill your bath tub or empty jugs with tap water.

There are times I actually believe these stores pay the weatherman an undisclosed amount of cash under the table to  frighten people into believing a hurricane is eminent.

Unlike black Friday which happens annually, a hurricane sale can happen many times a year, like this past year, or go years without a sale.. 

The lines at the stores are out the door, police need to direct traffic in and out of gas stations.

This whole conspiracy if true can back fire when people start  returning the pallets of bottled water they never had to use. It's like buying a dress or suit to wear at a wedding then returning it after you use it.

Odds are, one day one of these  hurricane warnings will come to truism, but nobody will  pay attention.

How many hurricane warnings will be needed until one really strikes? In the mean time this whole hurricane warning system reminds me of the boy who cried wolf, only this time time it's the weatherman that cried wolf.

This surge in sales should keep  retailers happy until black Friday.  Until then, Obama Da Dog reporting for K.I.M.O. news.

Disclaimer;
Yes everyone , this is blog is tongue -n-cheek. Comedy relief, so to speak... On a serious note,  we pray hurricane ANA does not  do any major damage. Be safe!





P.S.
A great song from Big Island musician Chris Kua who composed; "Hurricane Iselle Song" 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zTMyM08bKz4#t=44

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Saturday, October 18, 2014

"Ebola scare..." 'Judith Whitehead' (Inspiration Sunday)

Judith Whitehead lives in Amherst New York and has worked in
the ophthalmology field of medicine for over 30 years.
Ebola scare

This spreading of Ebola into the US has got me really concerned; we flew a few weeks ago and I am becoming a germ a phobic.

Now I travel with chlorox wipes to clean my seat, arm rests, table that drops down etc, I carry a mask with me as well.We all know that they turn these planes around in minutes and DO NOT clean the planes between flights.  

My son just flew also and I am worried for him flying to TEXAS. A solution that would help is to stop all International flights from entering our country to keep the US safe. Body fluids can't be the only way to contract this?

Is there more we should know about??? I think so...

P.S.
Cruise ship quarantines passenger who may have had contact with Ebola virus;
http://www.nbcnews.com/storyline/ebola-virus-outbreak/texas-hospital-worker-who-may-have-handled-ebola-samples-caribbean-n227971

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Friday, October 17, 2014

"How to save American jobs..!" ' Chester "Unc" Lau- (Source)

Dakinetalks favorite Uncle (Chester Lau)
"Unc"  is really passionate about creating a national Caregivers day.
Any help , support or ideas would be greatly appreciated...
'Unc' currently resides on the Hawai'ian Island of Oahu. 
He is a retired cinematographer,
 and  enjoys giving the politicians a bad time...


How to save American jobs
   
Let's all do this:  "request to speak to an American in the USA" when talking to a foreigner re your account, sales, etc. whatever...giving more work for Americans instead of work being jobbed out of country.  

I thought this was a great idea and so I'm sending this along.  If you think so too, please pass it along to your friends. If our government can't figure out how to create jobs here, well then it's time to show them how it's done.   Bring jobs back to the USA.! 

The gas company serving this area brought their call center back to Phoenix from India last year after numerous customer complaints. What a difference now when you call them...and it created 300 jobs.
I know this works because they were so bad that when India answered I wouldn't even deal with them. I'd simply ask to be transferred to a rep. in the U.S. and they would comply.

Now that I know it is the LAW - I will do it for sure

Any time you call an 800 number (for a credit card, banking, Verizon, health and other insurance, computer help desk, etc.) and you find that you're talking to a foreign customer service representative (perhaps in India, Philippines, etc), please consider doing the following:

After you connect and you realize that the customer service representative is not from the USA (you can always ask if you are not sure about the accent), please, very politely, say, "I'd like to speak to a customer service representative in the United States"

The rep might suggest talking to his/her manager, but, again, politely say,
"Thank you, but I'd like to speak to a customer service representative in the USA."

YOU WILL BE IMMEDIATELY CONNECTED TO A REP IN THE USA.

That's the rule and the LAW.
It takes less than one minute to have your call re-directed to the USA.

Tonight when I got redirected to a USA rep, I asked again to make sure - and yes, she was from Fort Lauderdale ..

Imagine what would happen if every US citizen insisted on talking to only US phone reps from this day on? Imagine how that would ultimately impact the number of US jobs that would need to be created?

If I tell 10 people to consider this and you tell 10 people to consider doing this - see what I mean... it becomes an exercise in Viral Marketing 101.

 Remember: The goal here is to restore jobs back here at home - not to be abrupt or rude to a foreign phone rep.  You may even get correct answers, good advice, and solutions to your problem.

 If you agree, please tell 10 people you know, and ask them to tell 10 people they know....etc...etc


 A note to Unc from Jack Lord star of the original Hawaii Five-O,
where "Unc" worked as a cinematographer



Ninety-nine percent of all lawyers give the rest a bad name.


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Thursday, October 16, 2014

"Teacher insists on no baby talk..." 'Robert Bitos Gandia' (Source)



Guest-blogger,Robert Bitos Gandia.
Robert is an avid cook (ono gandule rice) and always laughing!!
He works at Syngenta as a Research Associate.
Robert lives in Kekaha on Kauai's west-side and loves football!!




Teacher insists on no baby talk

A group of four-year-old's were trying very hard to become accustomed to school.
The biggest hurdle they faced was that the teacher insisted on NO baby talk!

"You need to use 'Big People' words," she was always reminding them. "Alex what did you do over the weekend?"
"I went to visit my Nana."

"No, you went to visit your GRANDMOTHER. Use 'Big People' words!" She then asked Mitchell what he had done.
"I took a ride on a choo-choo."

"No, you took a ride on a TRAIN. You must remember to use 'Big People' words," she said. She then asked little Little Johnny what he had done.

"I read a book," he replied.
"That's WONDERFUL!" the teacher said. "What book did you read?"

Little Johnny thought very hard about it, then puffed out his chest with great pride and said, "Winnie the SH-T."



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Wednesday, October 15, 2014

"Family can be many things..." 'Bettejo Dux' (Classic Wednesday)

Bettejo Dux has lived on the cosmic Garden Island of Kaua'i for over 40 years...
Bettejo is the author of the famed novellas "The Scam."
and recently published  "Children of Extinction..." 
Both books available on www.amazon.com

Family can be many things

Family is such a nice word, don’t you think? But, like everything today, it has a dark side. One can think of the Italian Mafia. The Christian Mafia. What a nerve. Stealing a perfectly good word.

I think all of us who love animals want them to become part of the family. A loving family. Some of us have bigger, and more varied, loving animal families than others. Mind you I’m not recommending you become an animal collector. Who needs three hundred cats in a two-bedroom house? The smell alone would not sit well. But, if the house is big enough-half a barn for an example-it’s okay to have a horse, a Macaw, an over-grown puppy and two kittens. Don’t you think?

Okay, I’m trying to rationalize my family. My zoo. It’s an enormous project but a fascinating, wonderful, delightful one. Sometimes.

I think, in so many ways, animals are much smarter than people. I mean, they don’t have any religious hang-ups. They don’t go to church. They don’t wage wars. Never knew of one animal who built a nuclear weapon. They don’t need telephones, computers, microwaves, pots and pans and hotplates. They don’t even need a Vitamix.

Oh, they do eat each other. Occasionally, but usually only when they’re hungry. There are predators and prey but they get along at the watering holes which is more than a lot of human beer drinkers do. No animal I ever knew participated in a brawl in an Irish pub. If you know of such an instance please let me know and we’ll talk about it here. Should be fun.

There is a decided scientific factor in such a family structure. Observe. Observe. Observe. Beats getting glued to the tube, except for the excellent episodes filmed and projected here on Ho’ike. Rosa and Reba stole the show last time. It went to their heads. The next morning, right after breakfast, they bounced into the cat carrier. It didn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out they saw stardom on the horizon. As their manager, I’m working on a six-figure contract with Kai and Jay and Jule. I get a whopping hundred percent of when a settlement is reached. Paper makes excellent tinder.

Reba and Rosa aren't interested in money. That’s smarter than people, too, don’t you think?

In our family there won’t ever be a conflict about the long green stuff but, of course, I've promised them the best food, shelter and playground money can buy. The only thing I ask is that they don’t eat Boots-the grown up puppy- or Duke-the noisy Macaw who has already learned to call them.

“Here Reba. Here Rosa. Where the bleep are you?”

We do communicate. Dysfunctional families don’t communicate.

I’m teaching them to sing. They have pretty voices. They eat well and bounce and wrestle and stalk make-believe prey. I don’t buy toys. They have to learn to play with long strings and flying leaves and navigate tree trunks and branches.

They are peaceful, playful, and loving.



Here is the video link:
http://vp.telvue.com/preview?id=T01393&video=205423

or http://www.hoike.org Arts and Entertainment

*SUPPORT LOCAL ACCESS!!*

 Hana Hou, (Encore) Shared From Facebook...






Monday, October 13, 2014

"The new Hawaii motor vehicle safety checks..." ( Kimo's world #37) 'James "Kimo" Rosen'

James “Kimo” Rosen is a retired professional photographer living in Kapa'a
 with his best friend Obama Da Dog, Rosen also blogs as a hobby...
It may be time to take the bus again... 

Kimo's world #37

The new Hawai'i safety checks

I lived in Alaska for 30 years and  safety checks on vehicles were never required. You would not believe what people drove. Jed Clampett's Beverley Hillbillies vehicle would had be legal tender in Alaska back in the day. Now?

Hawai'i, the state that is the polar opposite of Alaska has adopted computerized digital safety checks that has everyone from the  mechanics  to the customers saying, "Wednesday, Thursday and Friday." (WTF?)

So far I have been to three safety inspection locations. The first also changed my oil. While my car was up on the rack they noticed a CV joint that might need replacement. In the past CV joints were never even looked at.  The irony is that  they don't do mechanical work, so finding a CV joint that needed repair wasn't going to pad their pocket books. My car failed.

The next day I go to another place, they have a sign up that says no safety inspections today. The owner told me they lose money on inspections and being that his head mechanic was out sick, he had zero time for inspections. Inspections can take 20 minutes  give or take. I was told by the time they pay the state they only net approximately $3.50. out of the $20.00 they charge. Time could be much better spent on a real mechanical problem.

The state really needs to set up it's own safety inspection stations. Unless the place doing the inspections is also finding things wrong they can charge for, like new tires, they wind up losing money. 

All three places I went to had a sign advising customers of all the other places to go for inspections. The only reason a business does that is because they do not want your business.

I  go to place number three where they said it would be a 45 minute wait. I think they said that only to discourage me to go somewhere else, although I was the only customer there. Fine. I will wait. Ironically I only waited  10 minutes. I called their bluff.

The new safety inspection has the mechanic or shop owner utilizing  a state issued I-pad with webcam. The mechanic or safety inspector must do all the work themselves. It used to be you took your vehicle in for your annual inspection and they said, "right signal, left signal,. hit your brakes, OK you passed..."   Not so quick anymore muchacho.... The state is putting the burden of inspections and liability on the mechanic and or motor vehicle repair place. You no longer hit your own brakes, they tell you to leave the vehicle and do everything themselves while photographing everything form the VIN number to the tread on your tires.

This  place had inspected my car the last 3 years in a row and it never failed.  Since the day I purchased my vehicle it always had a ding in the passenger side tail light housing. This time they failed me for it? I begged them just let it go. They explained it's not like the old days, they already took a photo of it and  once it's in the computer they are liable. 

So, I need a tail lamp housing that nobody in town stocks.  The place is kind enough to shop on eBay for me. Maybe I will have the tail light housing in a week or two? 

 I have a paid receipt but no safety sticker. In the interim if stopped by an officer of the law they can still issue a ticket. There is no guarantee just because you have receipt you won't get ticketed even though you allegedly have 30 days to correct the infraction. Weird law...

 Until such time as  my part comes in its time to take my chances  and drive with  an expired safety inspection sticker, or  take the bus.

The Bus, no worries of tickets, gas, repairs, insurance, maintenance, registration, auto club memberships etc. It's like having your own personal chauffeur

I think it may  be time to retire my vehicle for good! Big brother is everywhere. Life just ain't what it used to be.

Epilogue; 
The best news is the safety inspection place called and said they found a used tail light housing for half of what it would had cost on eBay.($25.00) They sold it to me for what they paid for it and installed at no additional charge.Plus they issued my inspection sticker! Now that's ALOHA!

P.S.
More information on the new Hawai'i motor vehicle safety checks;
http://www.civilbeat.com/2013/12/20599-bumpy-road-for-hawaiis-new-high-tech-vehicle-safety-check-program/


http://www.hawaiinewsnow.com/story/24759018/exclusive-new-safety-check-stickers-easily-erased-altered


P.S.S.
I also had an opinion article published in today's (10-13-14) Kaua'i Garden Island news;
"Getting harder all the time to discipline children..."
http://thegardenisland.com/news/opinion/mailbag/letters-for-monday-october/article_b6ebb6a8-52a7-11e4-bde1-73bc665d3141.html


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Saturday, October 11, 2014

"Touring the newer Holocaust Museum of Los Angeles..." 'Judith Whitehead' (Inspiration Sunday)

Judith Whitehead lives in Amherst New York and has worked in
the ophthalmology field of medicine for over 30 years.

One of the exhibits at the Holocaust museum in Los Angeles.
Another example of mans inhumanity to man.

Photo by Judith Whitehead


Touring the newer Holocaust Museum of Los Angeles

Recently we were visiting my son in L.A. and thought we would drive down to the old Jewish Section of  Los Angeles. It has changed quite a bit from years gone by and has been greatly populated by other  ethnic groups along with closed down properties. In the middle of the area was built a new Holocaust museum about 4 yrs ago which is a fortress of concrete and security checkpoints. You are buzzed in for  underground free parking and follow an elevator to the entrance inside the building, questioned as to your reason for entering and given a pair of headphones and an I-phone.

 The museum is much smaller than ones we had been to before; the museum in Washington is much bigger. So much concrete 
surrounds the museum that an I-phone has no signal down there. Each picture was numbered and you were given the option to listen with your headphones about the story behind the photo. It took us 1-2  hours to listen to many stories and we didn't even hear all of them. There is a testimonial wall of those  that have recorded their stories as well. They do have free tours during the day to follow. 

It is set up much differently than our Washington museum with more talking and less artifacts but still very informative. A donation is suggested but not required. Since it is located around the corner from Cantors Famous Deli we felt the need to stop in and sample the great deli food they have to offer; can’t pass up a bowl of matzo ball soup and a lean corned beef sandwich. 

The Deli looks like it too was  preserved in time; it still has the look of the 50’s but the food is fresh as ever...



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