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Wednesday, September 7, 2011

"Troubles in The U.S.A." 'Chester Lau'

Dakinetalk's friend, Chester Lau (Unc) is back with the facts about the recession...

Many people are now homeless because of the recession....

The recession has hit everybody really hard...

My neighbour got a pre-declined credit card in the mail.
CEO's are now playing miniature golf.
Exxon-Mobil laid off 25 Congressmen.
I saw a Mormon with only one wife.
If the bank returns your check marked "Insufficient Funds", call them and ask if they meant "you" or "them".
McDonald's is selling the 1/4 ouncer.
Angelina Jolie adopted a child from America.
Parents in Beverly Hills fired their nannies and learned their children's names.
My cousin had an exorcism but couldn't afford to pay for it, so they re-possessed her !
A truckload of Americans was caught sneaking into Mexico
A picture is now only worth 200 words.
When Bill and Hillary travel together, they now share a room.
The Treasure Island casino in Las Vegas is now managed by Somali pirates.
And, finally....
I was so depressed last night thinking about the economy, wars,  jobs, my savings, Social Security, retirement funds, etc. that
I called the Suicide Hot-line and  got a call centre in Pakistan.
When I told them I was suicidal, they got all excited, and asked if I could drive a truck.
Be well my friend and stay cool...
The opinions, beliefs and viewpoints expressed by the various authors and forum participants on this blog site do not necessarily reflect the opinions, beliefs and viewpoints of the Publisher of Dakinetalk the blog, but they could? ;D)

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Douglas Dunn said...

via Facebook;""Now that was really gut-busting funny, with kernels of poignant truth underpinning almost every hilarious tidbit."

James "Kimo" Rosen said...

Doug, from Jay Leno,"[As Rodney Dangerfield] I tell you, I went to the bank, asked for a loan, the guy said 'We were just gonna ask you the same thing.' ... The economy is so bad, today, I saw Bill Maher praying. That's how bad. People in San Francisco can only afford Rice now; no more Roni. ... I saw Mrs. Fields today selling Girl Scout cookies. That's how bad. Saw a guy at Costco buying one roll of toilet paper. That's how bad. The economy is so bad now pigs can no longer afford lipstick."

Judith Whitehead said...

via Facebook;"Enjoyed your post..."

Anonymous said...

via Facebook;"James Kimo Rosen.Harmony Bentosino.Davis D. Danizier.Debbie Eayrs.Douglas Dunn.Judith Whiterhead like this

Harmony Bentosino said...

via Facebook;"Very funny."