"At the Zoo, sample chapter-Planet Japan..." 'James "Kimo" Rosen'

The enclosed blog is a sample from my 2004 book, "Planet Japan." 
The book contains 30 stream of conscious essays about my feelings
in this foreign land.  Enjoy... 

Living a memory and knowing and cherishing it now... 119, (Ichi, Ichi, Kyu) not 911 is the number to call for an emergency in Japan. The date is listed with the year first and the postal zip code on letters is the first thing addressed on an envelope, not the last as it is in America.

At the Omuta zoo, I found a quiet place to eat peanuts and everyone thought as they walked by that I was one of the attractions. In the town of 100,000, I was one of about six Caucasian people.

Relaxing at the zoo, watching the lone giraffe, the lone elephant, the lone lesser panda, I know how they feel. One elephant, one giraffe, one lion, one tiger and one Gai-jin (foreigner) fitting in at the zoo.

I had my first McDonald’s hamburger since leaving America. It actually felt like home, like a friend, like being with family. The McDonald’s hamburger was my refuge, on sale at only 59 Yen, about 50 cents US. Never in my wildest dreams or nightmares would I have imagined a McDonald’s hamburger being my refuge and salvation.

Japanese beer is not beer it's a drug all its own. Most Japanese beers are 5.5 percent alcohol. Suntory makes a beer called Suntory 2002 that is 6.5 percent alcohol. The Japanese munch on soybeans not chips while drinking beer. The beer in Japan is lethal and in the day we drink iced (Oocha) Japanese green tea with more caffeine than coffee just to recover from the beer.

Ironically I had three weeks of vacation and chose to stay in Omuta. Traveling stresses me more than work and is very expensive so I’m staying put and enjoying my own backyard! In America I enjoy traveling alone, but in Japan it's very difficult since all the signs and names of cities are in Kanji which I still do not read. In America I enjoy being alone, in Japan I need to be held by the hand. Funny that when I have free time, I miss all the action of teaching. Ironically, I was looking forward to my vacation, now I am looking forward to school starting. The students are my friends!

Why travel? I have a two-bedroom tatami mat, Japanese-style apartment overlooking two retirees gardens and beyond that a park. The other night I was laying on my futon staring at a full moon outside my sliding lanai door. I can bicycle and walk everywhere. Omuta is considered country.
Yellow watermelons, three huge eggplants, five apples, one dozen large eggs, large loaf bread, three boxes of tofu, Salmon steaks, two skinless chicken breasts, all these items can be purchased for 100 Yen (.88 cents 33US). Keep in mind 100 Yen is about 12% less than one US dollar. Again another falsehood about Japan is that everything is so expensive. I have never tasted better produce or spent so little on everything from cucumbers to garlic to fish to snacks to school supplies to CD's/videos... Yada Yada Yada. Japan truly is Hyaku Yen (100 Yen) country, and the city of Omuta is cheaper than other places in Japan. My friend from Tokyo remarked I was blessed to live in Omuta! 

When you hear Japan is expensive it's because most people base their facts on Tokyo, that would be like saying America is expensive if we based everything on New York City.

The simplest things give me such a feeling of accomplishment. I went to the video store and in broken Japanese, English and charades was able to purchase a membership card. I went to a discount store called Direx to purchase a brand new refrigerator for 188,000 Yen about $160.00 US. My employers furnished a refrigerator in my apartment but it is so old, that it used ten kilowatt hours of electricity a day versus approximately two kilowatt hours per day for this new energy efficient refrigerator/ freezer. I figured I would save in electricity in my time remaining in Japan more than what the refrigerator/freezer cost me. I was able to convey I needed it delivered and for 1000 Yen about $8.78 US I had two young men deliver it to my apartment. Rent is paid by my employers but I am responsible for the utilities. Water, electric and gas, all utilities cost less than $100 US per month.

I’d been getting my haircut by a beautician who is a friend of a friend, but she was scared to cut too much of my hair. Many barbers are afraid to cut foreign hair for fear of making a mistake. I finally had to go to another barber and explain that I wanted to keep my ponytail Hawaiian style), but wanted the rest of my hair cut like anyone else. Not only did I get a perfect haircut but I also got an old time hot towel shave and they trimmed the hair that grows out of your ears with a device I have never seen before. The cost was only 1500 Yen about $12.00 US and there is no tipping in Japan. It’s one of my favorite qualities or should we say inequalities.

I am on the Japanese National Health plan, taking advantage of getting much needed dental work done while in Japan. The Japanese do not use rubber gloves like in America. Dental work costs very little, I had two missing teeth replaced and capped many teeth. The total cost was around $10,000 (Yen), about $88 (US) for major work, about 10 visits including xrays, and teeth cleaning. There is one assistant that speaks English, the dentist’s daughter, her name is Mami (pronounced Mommy). It is nice going to see mommy at the dentist! To relax in Japan I go to the dentist...

The simplest activities like getting a haircut, going to the doctor, having something delivered, making transactions at the bank or post office are challenging. It's like being a kid and learning everything for the first time.34I hang out at a local mall called YoumeTowne or Dream Town, and people-watch and let the people watch me. Many people go to hang out in the air-conditioning. Starbucks, Mister Donut, McDonald’s, Kentucky Fried Chicken and Toys R Us, are the American influences in this mall. My favorite food at the mall is called Taco Yaki. Octopus fried balls are oishii (delicious). They would be a hit in America, I know it.

Everyone uses the word Dozo, when seating you in a restaurant, when handing you something. It means please. I thought people were calling me Bozo... My friend introduced me to his wife Miho (Me hoe). I thought how crude introducing your wife as your hoe. Aito (eight-o) in Japanese means lets see. I asked a friend the score of the soccer game and he said aito, I said thank you... Hai (hy) means yes and is a basic acknowledgment used constantly in the Japanese language. I thought people were just being friendly and said Hy a lot.

I’m taking photos daily with a Fuji disposable 35 mm camera to go along with my text. I want to show that in photography as well as in sex, it's not the tool but the carpenter. Ironically I am a professional photographer by trade and people found humor in me using a disposable camera. Disposable cameras are great, if you loose one it’s not a major financial loss and you can always keep one on you as easy as carrying a pack of cigarettes, you’ll never miss the chance for a Pulitzer. In photos, the Japanese are obsessed with giving the peace sign. I must act candid and fast to get a photo without the peace sign. Mark Twain once said, "The best way to cheer yourself up is to try cheering up someone else."

Gambette Kudasai (keep your spirits up)

Hana Hou, (Encore)   Shared from my photos of Japan