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Thursday, December 19, 2013

"Your duck is dead..." 'Robert Bitos Gandia' (Source-From somewhere on Facebook)

 Please  welcome back Dakinetalk's newest guest-blogger,Robert Bitos Gandia.
Robert is an avid cook (ono gandule rice) and always laughing!!
He works at Syngenta as a Research Associate.
Robert lives in Kekaha on Kauai's west-side and loves football!!

Your duck is dead

A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary surgeon. As she laid her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the bird's chest. After a moment or two, the vet shook his head and sadly said, "I'm sorry, your duck, Cuddles, has passed away." 

The distressed woman wailed, "Are you sure?" "Yes, I am sure. Your duck is dead," replied the vet.. 

"How can you be so sure?" she protested. "I mean you haven't done any testing on him or anything. He might just be in a coma or something." 

The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the room. He returned a few minutes later with a black Labrador Retriever. As the duck's owner looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs, put his front paws on the examination table and sniffed the duck from top to bottom. He then looked up at the vet with sad eyes and shook his head. 

The vet patted the dog on the head and took it out of the room. A few minutes later he returned with a cat. The cat jumped on the table and also delicately sniffed the bird from head to foot. The cat sat back on its haunches, shook its head, meowed softly and strolled out of the room. 

The vet looked at the woman and said, "I'm sorry, but as I said, this is most definitely, 100% certifiably, a dead duck." 

The vet turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys and produced a bill, which he handed to the woman..

The duck's owner, still in shock,took the bill. "$150!" she cried, "$150 just to tell me my duck is dead!" 

The vet shrugged, "I'm sorry. If you had just taken my word for it, the bill would have been $20, but with the Lab Report and the Cat Scan, it's now $150."

P.S. Very Funny...

A man was seated next to a kid in an airplane. 

The man turned to him and said, "Let's talk".

Kid: Ok, what do we talk about?

Man (making fun of the kid): How about nuclear power?

Kid: Very interesting topic. But let me ask you a question... Horse, cow & deer, all eat grass. Yet deer excretes pellets, cow flat potty and horse clumps. Why?

Man: I don't know.


Kid: Do u really feel qualified enough to discuss nuclear issues when you don’t know shit??


Hana Hou, (Encore) Shared from Facebook...












8 comments:

KimoRosen said...

Bitos's photo is below, for some reason his photo did not post with blog?
James Kimo Rosen's photo.

Harmony Bentosino said...

Funny!

KimoRosen said...

Bito's , how do you copy from my wall? I have tried to do it numerous times. I just use share it copies but doesn't copy comments like you did? any help would be greatly appreciated!

Robert Bitos Gandia said...

I just highlight the text, then ctrl c then ctrl v in the comments.

Anonymous said...

Bito's , how do you copy from my wall? I have tried to do it numerous times. I just use share it copies but doesn't copy comments like you did? any help would be greatly appreciated!

KimoRosen said...

like that

KimoRosen said...

James Kimo Rosen
7 hours ago
Thursday is throwback day on the View, and my throwback photo of me and my sheepdog Kamala made it on national TV today (12-19-13)
the photo is on the bottom far left. Don't tell my current dog Obama I was on national TV with another dog, she gets jealous.
Photo: Thursday is throwback day on the View, and my throwback photo of me and my sheepdog Kamala made it on national TV today (12-19-13)
the photo is on the bottom far left. Don't tell my current dog Obama I was on national TV with another dog, she gets jealous.
Like · · Stop Notifications · Promote · Share
Wynne Moss Abernathy, Gary Borkan, Chuck Lasker and 2 others like this.

James Kimo Rosen
James Kimo Rosen's photo.
7 hours ago · Like · 1

Chuck Lasker You look like a damned hippie!
7 hours ago · Unlike · 1

James Kimo Rosen I was!
6 hours ago · Like · 1

Pete Antonson Was that picture your resume when Hooser hired you? Lookin' cool BTW!
6 hours ago · Unlike · 2

James Kimo Rosen Good one Pete! ;D) for you I will say LOL!
6 hours ago · Like

Wynne Moss Abernathy Lovely "Mom" that Kamala, put you through school. When tuition was due so was she! ⭐

KimoRosen said...

I've kind of got it? I just copied another post of mine here to practice, Mahalo bruddah