"What does it take to raise a Baby in the year 2014 ..." 'Judith Whitehead' (Inspiration Sunday)

Judith Whitehead lives in Amherst New York and has worked inthe ophthalmology field of medicine for over 30 years.

What does it take to raise a Baby in the year 2014

Recently I was invited to a baby shower; many of my friends’ children are now having babies which is so
wonderful to celebrate. I decided to take a visit to the baby supplies store and check the registry of items she had listed for purchase.

Now it’s been a very long time since I had entered a baby store; 30 years to be exact. Was I in for an eye opener.   Back in the day… there were certain items that were necessities including a crib, layette table, walker, high chair and a stroller.  These were the basics in addition to all the soft goods such as towels,
diapers etc.  It was a sizable investment in the 1980’s; I spent much of my day, changing, feeding, rocking and reading to our sons.  We had many outings to the park and many neighborhood walks.

It seems that things have really changed as far as the necessities required to raise a baby.  I was speechless as I toured the baby store.  There were cradles to place the baby in that were motorized and were programmed to move in various patterns of direction and motion.  

What happened to manually rocking the baby? These hi tech devices were several hundred dollars; the walkers that we had used that cost about $20.00 back then were now very sophisticated in shapes of trucks and cars and were much more intricate than ever before and so was the price.  

There were devices that made noises to place in the crib to help the baby sleep such as the sound of waves or wind or heart beats; what happened to turning on the mobile atop the crib and singing the baby to sleep? Don’t get me wrong, there are plenty of new ingenious inventions that make a lot of sense today such as a cover to put in the shopping cart where the child can sit to keep them from many germs.  Teaching toys that talk along with a book that is
being read and many other educational inventions.  

Many of the equipment for parents to use do make life easier I am sure,  but are they taking the place of a Childs’ own creativity ;  are these devices making it easier to raise a child into an adult but leaving out the important things that a baby needs for growth and development?  If a baby only can fall asleep with certain noises in the crib, how will they sleep later on in life.  

Many times we eat breakfast or dinner out during the week and see families with their children.  It seems that the majority of the meal is eaten in near silence, mom and dad reading their I phone or reading the paper and the children playing on their own I pad or electronic device.  

What happened to eating as a family, sharing ideas and conversing with  each other?  Are we raising a group of young people that are unable to express their ideas person to person and only able to text to each other.    

I think in the long run we will be finding that some of this technology will   be causing social problems down the line .   Yes we will have very knowledgeable children that can surf  the world wide web but what kind of social beings will they turn out to be?  It does give us food for thought; for me, if I am ever lucky enough to have an extended family…its books and hands on entertainment for us.  The children will have to suffer through walks in the park,  field trips to museums ,   visits to the zoo and talking about their days to name a few things. It will be the sacrifice they will have to make. ;)

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Social Security reality..." Robert Bitos Gandia (Source)

 Guest-blogger,Robert Bitos Gandia.
Robert is an avid cook (ono gandule rice) and always laughing!!
He works at Syngenta as a Research Associate.
Robert lives in Kekaha on Kauai's west-side and loves football!!

Social Security reality

Prelude;
Who died before they collected Social Security? 
KEEP PASSING THIS AROUND UNTIL 
EVERY ONE HAS HAD THE OPPORTUNITY TO READ IT...
THIS IS SURE SOMETHING TO THINK ABOUT!!!!
THE ONLY THING WRONG WITH THE 
GOVERNMENT'S CALCULATION OF AVAILABLE SOCIAL SECURITY IS THEY FORGOT 
TO FIGURE IN THE PEOPLE WHO DIED BEFORE THEY EVER COLLECTED A SOCIAL SECURITY CHECK!!!
WHERE DID THAT MONEY GO?


Remember, not only did you and I contribute to Social Security but your employer did, too.
It totaled 15% of your income before taxes.
If you averaged only $30K over your working life, that's close to $220,500.
Read that again.
Did you see where the Government paid in one single penny?
We are talking about the money you and your employer put in a Government bank to insure you and 
Me that we would have a retirement check from the money we put in, not the Government.
Now they are calling the money we put in an entitlement when we reach the age to take it back.
If you calculate the future invested value of $4,500 per year (yours & your employer's contribution) at a simple 5% interest (less than what the Government pays on the money that it borrows).
After 49 years of working you'd have $892,919.98. If you took out only 3% per year, you'd receive $26,787.60 per year and it would last better than 30 years (until you're 95 if you retire at age 65) and that's with no interest paid on that final amount on deposit!
If you bought an annuity and it paid 4% per year, you'd have a lifetime income of $2,976.40 per month.
THE FOLKS IN WASHINGTON 
HAVE PULLED OFF A BIGGER PONZI SCHEME
THAN BERNIE MADOFF EVER DID.
Entitlement my foot; I paid cash for my social security insurance!
Just because they borrowed the money for other government spending, doesn't make my benefits some 
Kind of charity or handout!!
Remember Congressional benefits?
· free healthcare,
· outrageous retirement packages,
· 67 paid holidays,
· three weeks paid vacation,
· unlimited paid sick days.
Now that's welfare, and they have the nerve to call my social security retirement payments entitlements?
They call Social Security and Medicare an entitlement even though most of us have been paying for 
It all our working lives, and now, when it's time for us to collect, the government is running out of money.
Why did the government borrow from it in the first place?
It was supposed to be in a locked box, not part of the general fund.
Sad isn't it?

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"FANTASY AND THE FUTURE..." 'Bettejo Dux' (Classic Wednesday)

Bettejo Dux, a resident of Kauai for over forty years, is an 
award winning writer, columnist, novelist, peace and environmental 
activist who knows, and loves Kauai with a passion that shows up in her work

Above photo of Bettejo a few years back playing checkers with her nephew....

FANTASY AND THE FUTURE

Bob Woodruff said, "If you want to change the future, first you must imagine it."

Not all writers of fiction write about the future, but all fiction writers imagine a world that isn't true. It's a story created in their minds.  Characters who do not really exist.  Situations that did not happen. Conversations never put to voice. Struggles that are fantasies.

All readers of classic literature will think of George Orwell's 1984. Orwell was a prolific writer, and liberal  socialist,  who wrote about a future where the rulers controlled everything. Actions and thoughts  were monitored and manipulated.  Passion, truth, and individualism were a danger to the  members of this  state. His vision of the world has come to an almost eerie pass today.

The American journalist and prolific writer, Chris Hedges, writes in Death of the Liberal Class (2010) "....magical thinking, the idea that human and personal progress is somehow inevitable, leads to political passivity....It has turned whole nations, such as the United States, into self-consuming machines of death."

To bring us current on Kauai's machine of death, all we need do is turn to the daily newspaper, The Garden Island. Almost every day we read about a living creature on the island who must be eliminated. Feral cats-according to some-responsible for the extinction of wild bird life . Crowing roosters and all wandering free range chickens-practically our island bird, they're so beautiful-must be killed. Parakeets? Out with them. Coqui frogs? Noise polluters more annoying than helicopters, jets, drones, boom boxes, motorcycles or grumbling, rumbling over-size trucks carrying who- knows what, roaring up and down the highways day and night.  Ubiquitous traffic jams.  Horns honk, brakes squeal, humans and sirens scream.

Our super active military might,  RimPac and a 'Naval Battle Gun Rodeo' , with a 28 death quota allowed on mammals of the sea, wage visible war fare off shore.  This morning, Saturday, July 26, 2014, a whale beached itself and died in Hanalei. Coral reefs are dying. Ground water, fresh air, the very earth we walk and grow food on, are fouled by unlimited toxic herbicides and pesticides  sprayed everywhere without disclosure of quantity or brand. We know these toxins kill bees.

Truth, our planet is presently engaged in the sixth extinction and there are many who cheer and some who profit.

So how does a writer of fiction, with a passionate concern for life and living things, tell a story about Kauai that brings all this  madness into perspective?

Pare it down. In Children of the Extinction, I had to, as a friend said, bump off a lot of guys. Our number one problem: too many people? Solved.  Kauai cannot support the existing population and land speculators and tax collectors  want to bring in more. That had  to stop. Our economic system is a disaster. Out. Money is worthless. Power? Lights, water, communication, computers,  sewage and modern appliances out. Traffic problems solved. Can't pump gas.

To me, as a writer of fiction, it was better  to do the above problems in than living things.

 Bettejo is having her 84th birthday party and book signing! Everyone reading this is invited!
 Please come to Bettejo's Birthday Book Signing Bash at Birdies-in Kalaheo-Sunday, August 17, 3-6PM. It'll be fun. Birdies is a great place. CHILDREN OF THE EXTINCTION is a good read. Hope to see you there. Bettejo 

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"Pit bulls, Pet or Monster, you be the judge..." 'James "Kimo" Rosen' (Kimo's world #25)

James “Kimo” Rosen is a retired professional photographer living in
 Kapa'a with his best friend Obama Da Dog, Rosen also blogs as a hobby

Kimo's world #25

This blog also appeared as a guest column in the March 21,2015 edition of The Garden Island news;
http://thegardenisland.com/news/opinion/guest/pit-bulls-pet-or-monster-you-be-the-judge/article_ccc7e376-cf92-11e4-8407-1b001d87bec6.html

Pit bulls, Pet or Monster, you be the judge

Pit bulls are as common as spam musubi on Kaua'i.
http://allrecipes.com/recipe/spam-musubi/

I realize everyone loves their dogs as family, whether they are Pit bulls or rescue mutts.The question remains, are Pit bulls loving pets or monsters?  You be the judge.

Keeping Pit bulls  restricted to hunting and away from the general population is fine, or even to help eradicate the problematic feral cat population on Kauai. It's time to ban Pit bulls as pets in Hawai'i.  I know this  won't happen.  Many will call it a cultural thing, similar to the  fireworks argument.

 You will hear the argument that it's the owner and not the dog. This is true to an extent, however a dog breed that was originally bred as a fighting dog would not be my choice as a pet, especially around keiki.(children) I realize not all Pit bulls are bad, just like all murderers aren't bad. 

Not every Pit bull is bad. Just last week a Pit bull saved a deaf boy's life in Indianapolis. This is not the norm, rather the exception. 
http://www.philly.com/philly/blogs/phillypets/20140722_PET360_Pit_Bull_Saves_Deaf_Boy_From_House_Fire.html

I am one of the lucky and blessed ones. When my dog was attacked by a Pit bull last September  she survived with my quick thinking of lifting her by her collar with an exhausting swinging and saving venture of  keeping her away from the Pit bull. This went on for what seemed like an eternity until by the grace of God a good Samaritan came along  to wrestle the pit bull to the ground. 
http://thegardenisland.com/news/local/pit-bull-goes-after-obama/article_771d6838-1cf6-11e3-a87d-0019bb2963f4.html?_dc=916997558437.2878

After the Pit bull attacked my dog, the owner said, "she's always been the sweetest dog and only wanted to play. She's such a nice Pit bull, she's trained." A witness to the attack had told me that same dog had attacked numerous others.

You can train lions and tigers  too, however  would you want one as a pet? Probably not. No matter how  well trained a Pit bull can turn on you at any time. They kill people and other dogs. 

My neighbor was swimming in the waters of Anahola  beach a few years back, when her friend's Pit bull  ran into the water and nearly tore her arm off.  She wound up getting 38 stitches in her upper arm and is now petrified of any Pit bull and even of  swimming in the ocean. She was diagnosed with PTSD from that attack. To top things off my friend never pressed charges since the dog belonged to a friend of hers. The worst part of this, that dog is still  out there along with the Pit bull that attacked my dog.

Last month on Kauai  three Pit bulls were euthanized, and their owner cited by police, just hours after the dogs mauled a chihuahua mix to death in front of a Kekaha mother and daughter. If the little girl had not dropped the little dog, it could had been her that died.

Just last week a good friend's  terrier mix  rescue dog was attacked by a Pit bull at Wailua dog park and was rushed to the vet with over a $400.00 medical bill. I believe there is a disease of pandemic proportion on Kauai, and that disease is called, "Pit bull attacks," with most never even being reported. 

Stories like this are all too common on Kaua'i. Everyone knows a Pit bull owner and  since everyone knows everyone on the island, nobody wants to be the rat, narcing on their friends or relatives. This is  just one of the many unwritten laws of island life.

If Pit bulls are such wonderful family dogs, why have they been banned in 12 countries? That's right, 12!
 Belgium, Brazil, Denmark, Finland, France, Canada (Winnipeg, Quebec) the Netherlands, New Zealand, Norway, Poland, Puerto Rico and Sweden.

It is illegal in Miami-Dade County to own or keep American Pit Bull Terriers, American Staffordshire Terriers, Staffordshire Bull Terriers, or any other dog that substantially conforms to any of these breeds' characteristics.
There is also a $500 fine for acquiring or keeping a Pit bull in Miami Dade County.

These dogs are born with aggression and  the ability to kill.  You  never see a poodle attack and mutilate  a human or other animal. People go  la-la over these animals and value them more than the safety of another persons life.

The County will eventually take heed when a fellow human is mauled to death on county property and the lawsuits start rolling in. Until then things will never  change.
However, I will be the first to say, I told you so next time there is a death or injury associated with a Pit bull.

Pit bull, pet or monster? Please let us know!

 We welcome your rebuttal or support!

http://thegardenisland.com/news/opinion/guest/pit-bulls-pet-or-monster-you-be-the-judge/article_ccc7e376-cf92-11e4-8407-1b001d87bec6.html
James “Kimo” Rosen is a retired professional photographer living in Kapa'a with his best friend Obama Da Dog, Rosen also blogs as a hobby


P.S.

Rabbi Chaim Levi Cohen (of Montreal) Rabbi Berel Namdar of Sweden singing a Jewish song called a niggun during a Barbecue on kauai at Lydgate Park....
00:00:16
Added on 7/28/14

Kosher Barbecue at Lydgate park with my Rabbi friends!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2nzjz8ShRsg&feature=youtu.be

Hana Hou, (Encore) Shared from Facebook....

"The June Cleaver generation is long gone..." 'Judith Whitehead' (inspiration Sunday)

Judith Whitehead lives in Amherst New York and has worked in

the ophthalmology field of medicine for over 30 years.

The June Cleaver generation is long gone

A girl born in the 1950s was raised with certain expectations and goals that are much different from the girl born in the 21st century.

My mother was one of those moms from the “June Cleaver” generation, which meant her days were spent cleaning and cooking and having dinner on the table promptly at 5 p.m. to please the breadwinner of the family. My dad did not want my mom to work; that would have meant that he was not a good provider and that’s how the household was run.

I grew up observing my mom cleaning, and ironing every piece of clothing including the sheets and underwear. Her home was beyond spotless and she took great pride in her work. So it wasn’t surprising that I grew up with some of those values and goals to find a good husband to provide for me and get a minimal college education after high school graduation.

So I went to a junior college and obtained a medical assisting degree; I was able to get a position in the medical field and began to realize I could make my own money. I married at a young age, 19, just as my mom had done, and was on my own. It was not until then that I realized that I could be my own person and began to feel fulfilled working in the health fields.

Let me tell you, the skills of cleaning and cooking are not inherited and I gleaned much more pleasure working in the health-related profession and helping people.

I went on to specialize in ophthalmology, became certified in the field and returned to college to obtain my bachelor’s degree in gerontology when I was well into my 30s. I found that it is never too late to get education and an “older” student is much smarter and much more dedicated to learning.

I was lucky enough to realize that if I was going to continue working for many more years, I knew it had to be something that fulfilled me while giving back at the same time. It seems so difficult for our young people to choose something they will be able to spend many years doing that will make them happy. That’s why they need to take the time to choose how they will spend their productive years. Don’t go for just the bucks; that pleasure will last for only so long. Take time to pick a profession that will bring both happiness and make an adequate living. The money will come if you excel in your field and happiness will be yours for all those working years.

Many of us will not be able to retire at age 65 completely; I will always want to do something with the public. My profession has not brought me excessive riches, but it has given me great satisfaction for more than 35 years in the workforce.

I still live by my mantra: Slow and steady wins the race. It may have taken me a few years longer to figure out that I can be a breadwinner as well, and dedication and time in a field does bring not only money but a greater satisfaction for self-worth.

This blog appeared in the 07-12-14 edition of the Buffalo News
with the title,"Take your time when choosing a career."
http://www.buffalonews.com/life-arts/womens-voices/take-your-time-when-choosing-a-career-20140712

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"I Finally Graduated..." 'Bonnie Brenton' (Special Guest-Blogger)

Guest-blogger Bonnie Brenton grew up in Portland, Maine and
 obtained a Masters in counseling from the University of Mass. at Amherst.

I Finally Graduated
                                                           
It took me 10 years, but I finally graduated with my Master’s degree in counseling.  I spent the last six years taking one class at a time.  The normal course load is two classes.  However, I have an anxiety disorder, and by taking only one course, I could actually relax and enjoy myself.  Before this school, I took four years applying to other programs and getting rejected four times.

The academic portion of my sojourn proved relatively easy.  Then it was time for the practicum and internship.  The difference between the two was that the practicum was 10 hours a week, and the internship was 30.  My first practicum placement was working with sex offenders in a program where they learned to recognize and avoid risky situations, such as being alone with potential victims.  I got along well with the offenders, and although they are known for being manipulative, I wasn’t there long enough to experience that.  Instead, I ran into problems with the director.  We did not get along, and she fired me.  I learned the hard way that my relationship with the staff is even more crucial than my relationship with the clients.  This is known as office politics.

I was forced to take a year’s leave of absence and had to apply for an extension because my school required its students to graduate in five years, and it would now take me six.  That year’s “sabbatical” was one of the most relaxing and enjoyable years of my life (simply because I had leisure time)!  Then, it was back to the grindstone as I began 30 hours a week of internship.  Next, you figure in classroom time, assignments, and commuting on the bus, and I was working well over 40 hours a week.  I had never before worked a fulltime job due to my anxiety disorder.  The hours were a challenge.  I became ill with a cold that didn’t get better until after I graduated.

It was a requirement of my program to divide the 30 hours /week between two different sites one of which was a substance abuse clinic.  Like before, I got along well with the clients but had problems with staff due to my anxiety, which can involve the use of technology.  I was not happy when my supervisor accused me of playing games because I was slow to comprehend a computer program which we used to write notes about the clients.   Even more incomprehensible, was another intern from my school who seemed to hate me.  One day, she bit off my head for not washing the coffee pot when I never knew that was part of my job description!  I can’t figure out why she was kind to everyone else and cruel to me.  She impressed her superiors to the point where they hired her after graduation.  This is one of life’s ironies and mysteries that remains unsolved.  I choose not to worry about it.

I was required to work at two locations, but I didn’t need to work them equally.  The director at my school advised me to leave the substance abuse clinic and work solely at my second site.  However, I felt I was making a difference for my clients, and didn’t want to leave until my discomfort and unhappiness reached the point of sheer agony.  I eventually realized I was sacrificing my own mental health for the sake of my clients.  I finally quit when the pain became unbearable.

My second site involved working at a preschool for children of low income families.  (These were very different populations.)  I don’t have children of my own and had no experience working with kids.  I didn’t even think that I liked children, but time was running out for me find a placement!  

Ironically, in spite of the fact that my major is counseling, I was thrust into the position of teacher’s aide.  However, I learned I could still use my counseling skills so long as I was working with people- in any capacity!  What I appreciated most was how much the teachers appreciated me!  I had felt so little appreciation from staff at my other sites.  I worked in four different classrooms.

One of the most enchanting aspects about working with these three, four, and five year old's was their names.  I have to hand it to their parents.  In order to protect the privacy of these children, I am not going to reveal any of their monikers.  However, I will give examples of similar but different names just so that you, the reader, can taste the flavor.  Here are some comparable names of both boys and girls:  
Sincerity, Jesus, Liberty, Buick, Devotion, Exodus, and Prince Charming!

As a person fascinated by names, how could I not enjoy working with these children?  As a person not used to kids, I must admit, there were times when they were a “pain in the ass” (like when they wouldn't listen).  But there were other times when they touched my heart (with hugs)!

There was one child who proved to be a real challenge.  He would be diagnosed with conduct disorder.  One time he found a brick and through it at me.  Luckily, I saw it coming and managed to catch it.  When he became angry during meals, he would try to upturn the tables.  One time, at recess, I saved the life of a bullfrog he was trying to kill by shooing it to escape under a fence.  Even then he continued throwing rocks and clumps of dirt from the garden.  He needed three teachers and two interns to manage his behavior.  We took him outside to an enclosed area when he acted out.

Before this child came to our attention, the other interns and I complained that what we were doing was not real counseling.  Suddenly, it all became very real!  I also must admit there were times when I felt bored working with the children.  This child cured me of that!

It seemed like my internship would never end, and then all of a sudden, it was over.  I finally graduated!  So what now?  I have a 4 step plan:
1-Throw a graduation party. 
2-Take a break.
3-Figure out what I want to do with my life.
4-Look for a job!

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"Fiction..." 'Bettejo Dux' (Classic Wednesday)

Bettejo Dux has lived on the cosmic Garden Island of Kaua'i for over 40 years.

Bettejo is a regular opinion writer in the Garden Island news and is the author of the

famed novella, "The Scam."  Her latest fiction

 "Children of extinction" is now  released and available on Amazon!
Mazol Tov & Congratulations to Bettejo!

www.bettejodux.com

Fiction

There's a profound saying, "The best liars are: actors and actresses, fiction writers, politicians.

Actors and actresses?  What could be a more radiant  lie than pretending to be someone else  on stage or screen? I mean, you are you, who you are, and being somebody you're not is a lie performed, hopefully,  well enough  your deceit  makes a captive audience-who knows who you are- believe you're somebody else.

I'm an actress. I love to act. I'm the sort of  actress who suffers opening night nerves every night. My knees knock.I shiver and shake. I'm miserable. Then  the curtain goes up, or I make an entrance, and- whoop-de-do- I'm somebody else. Bettejo's back stage, knees knocking, quaking, miserable. The most difficult role I ever played was Fonzia Dorsey- in The Gin Game- a  self-righteous over- the- hill diabetic in a seedy  old folk's home who I really disliked. There was a humorous quality here but a nastiness slopped through.

Fiction? I love writing fiction. I get lost in the story. I love or hate my characters, but every word I put on paper, page after page, is a lie. This is true of any piece of fiction written by any writer. The scary part of this  is when the book is published and you wait for the reader's response. You hope he or she loves it as much as you.

Politicians? Skip it.

The interesting part about fiction and acting, however-the hidden dimension-is that these lies are creative endeavors. One is using the 'gift'-or curse- to lie in a positive manner.  No harm is intended. A story  is to be told. A play  to be performed. The theater goer has come to the theater to be fooled-transported, lost for a while in an other world-as does the reader to a book.

A fictitious piece of story telling  is fantasy and the writer hopes the reader joins her on the journey she's concocted. Some stories are so compelling the reader-and the writer- may want to read it over and over. My husband read  Franny and Zooey once every year. A reader wrote of Salinger that he didn't think he'd like  him because he was such an incredibly believable liar. He missed the point, of course. Salinger told his lies on paper.

As a writer I'd  rather make people laugh. Laughter is good. I think The THE SCAM is a cute, funny, piece about life in the 60's on Kauai. CHILDREN of the EXTINCTION takes a hundred and 180 degree turn. Kauai, in the future, is not funny. But the  characters are very human and laughter is a very human quality. Even in some of the scariest scenes, they find laughter. They also find every emotion humans  can experience. Evil emotions as well. CHILDREN is a most controversial book. I come down hard on a subject one is not supposed to come down on. There is a Dark Side. That's part of the story-telling experience. Will the Dark Side win?

If you read me on Amazon, scan through SCAM  first.

 Bettejo is having her 84th birthday party and book signing! Everyone reading this is invited!
 Please come to Bettejo's Birthday Book Signing Bash at Birdies-in Kalaheo-Sunday, August 16, 3-6PM. It'll be fun. Birdies is a great place. CHILDREN OF THE EXTINCTION is a good read. Hope to see you there. Bettejo 

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