"Water, water and more water..."Bible saleman..." ' (Not so serious Sunday)Chester Lau'

Many thanks to guest blogger Chester Lau for all his contributions to dakinetalk, Chester you are dakine! :D)


The following will probably amaze and startle you.

One glass of water shuts down midnight hunger pangs for almost 100% of the dieters studied in a University study: Lack of water is the #1 trigger of daytime fatigue.

Preliminary research indicates that 8-10 glasses of water a day could significantly ease back and joint pain for up to 80% of sufferers.

A mere 2% drop in body water can trigger fuzzy short-term memory, trouble with basic math, and difficulty focusing on the computer screen.

Drinking 5 glasses of water daily decreases the risk of colon cancer by 45%, plus it can slash the risk of breast cancer by 79%, and one is 50% less likely to develop bladder cancer.

Are you drinking the amount of water you should every day? (No kidding, all of the above are true....)
Of course, too much water may have strange side effects......

Don't get carried away! Now that I have your attention, go get another glass of water!
BUT BE VERY, VERY CAREFUL!!!

Laugh often, long and loud... Laugh until you gasp for breath. And if you have friends who make you laugh, spend lots of time with them.

THE BIBLE SALESMEN-----A Great Way to Sell Bibles...If this doesn't

make you laugh, just go ahead and close your casket!)

A pastor concluded that his church was getting into very serious financial troubles. While checking the church storeroom, he discovered several cartons

of new Bibles that had never been opened and distributed.

So at his Sunday sermon, he asked for three

volunteers from the congregation who would be

willing to sell the Bibles door-to-door for $10

each to raise the desperately needed money for

the church.

Jack, Paul and Louie all raised their hands to

volunteer for the task.

The minister knew that Jack and Paul earned

their living as salesmen and were likely capable

of selling some Bibles. But he had serious

doubts about Louie who was a local farmer,

who had always kept to himself because he was

embarrassed by his speech impediment.

Poor Louie stuttered badly. But, NOT WANTING

TO discourage Louie, the minister decided to

let him try anyway.

He sent the three of them away with the back

seat of their cars stacked with Bibles. He asked

them to meet with him and report the results

of their door-to-door selling efforts the following Sunday.

Anxious to find out how successful they were,

the minister immediately asked Jack, "Well, Jack,

how did you make out selling our Bibles last week?"

Proudly handing the reverend an envelope,

Jack replied, "Using my sales prowess, I was

able to sell 20 Bibles, and here's the $200 I

collected on behalf of the church."

"Fine job, Jack!" The minister said, vigorously

shaking his hand..."You are indeed a fine salesman

and the church is indebted to you.."

Turning to Paul, "And Paul, how many Bibles

did you sell for the church last week?"

Paul, smiling and sticking out his chest, confidently replied, 'I am a professional salesman. I sold 28

Bibles on behalf of the church, and here's

$280 I collected.'

The minister responded, "That's absolutely

splendid, Paul. You are truly a professional

salesman and the church is indebted to you."

Apprehensively, the minister turned to Louie

and said, "And Louie, did you manage to sell

any Bibles last week?" Louie silently offered the minister a large envelope. The minister opened it

and counted the contents. "What is this?" the

minister exclaimed. "Louie, there's $3,200 in

here! Are you suggesting that you sold 320

Bibles for the church, door-to-door, in just one week?"

Louie just nodded.

"That's impossible!" both Jack and Paul said in

unison. "We are professional salesmen, yet you claim to have sold 10 times as many Bibles as we could."

"Yes, this does seem unlikely," the minister

agreed. "I think you'd better explain how you

managed to accomplish this, Louie."

Louie shrugged.."I-I-I re-re-really do-do-don't

kn-kn-know f-f-f-for sh-sh-sh-sure," he stammered.

Impatiently, Peter interrupted. "For crying out loud, Louie, just tell us what you said to them when they answered the door!"

"A-a-a-all I-I-I s-s-said wa-wa-was," Louis replied,

"W-w-w-w-would y-y-y-you l-l-l-l-l-like t-t-to

b-b-b-buy th-th-th-this B-B-B-B-Bible f-f-for

t-t-ten b-b-b-bucks---o-o-o-or--- wo-wo-would

yo-you j-j-j-just like m-m-me t-t-to st-st-stand

h-h-here and r-r-r-r-r-read it t-to y-y-you?"

 

 

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