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ALOHA FRIDAY
What's my Fortune, cookie?
Whether or not you put any degree of belief in them, fortune cookies are fun.
Back when I was a kid they were less sophisticated. More spelling mistakes. More inscrutable. Like "While you are reading this . . . ." What? Is someone sneaking up behind me with a knife? What did the left out part of my fortune say?
When I was really young I couldn't figure out how they got these things printed, or how they managed to fit them into the fortune cookie. I pictured some guy, dressed like our Chinese waiter, pecking away at a very tiny typewriter that held these miniature slips of paper. And then I pictured him sliding the newly-typed fortune in through one end of the cookie. Tough job.
I don't like eating fortune cookies. They seem rather bland to me. But I love reading the fortunes. If there's a group of us eating at a Chinese restaurant and the waiter brings a plate of fortune cookies, I open any of the extra ones (or the ones others choose not to take). When I bring home takeout there are usually a couple of extra fortune cookies in the bag. I save those and open one of them each morning for the next couple of days. It's an interesting way to start the day, sometimes.
My wife and I used to host New Year's Eve parties. I always went out and bought a batch of 'naughty' fortune cookies. You know, the kind that says things like "Man who go around with hand in pocket always feel a little cocky". They're much funnier when it's almost midnight and you've had several drinks.
Here's a few samples for you to enjoy:
Humorous fortunes
- The greatest danger could be your stupidity.
- He who laughs last is laughing at you.
- A good time to keep your mouth shut is when you're in deep water.
- Love is grand; divorce is a hundred grand.
- Oops...wrong cookie!
Romantic thoughts
- Love is for the lucky and the brave.
- One who admires you greatly is hidden before your eyes.
- To love is to forgive.
- Love conquers all.
- In the end, there are three things that last: faith, hope and love; and the greatest of these is love.
Inspirational messages
- Excitement and intrigue follow you closely wherever you go!
- Don't ask, don't say. Everything lies in silence.
- Nature, time and patience are the three best physicians.
- Fear is just excitement in need of an attitude adjustment.
- Common sense is instinct, and enough of it is genius.
- Never lose the ability to find beauty in ordinary things.
I tape favorite fortune cookie messages to the front of my computer monitor. These are some of my favorites:
- Nothing can keep you from reaching your goals. Do it!
- You will obtain your goal if you maintain your course.
- You have a charming way with words and should write a book.
(got that one twice over the course of several months)
And my absolutely most favorite (for now):
- We must always have old memories and young hopes.
Have a great Aloha Friday.
