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Wednesday, January 7, 2015

"The Raffle Ticket..." Robert Bitos Gandia (Source)

Guest-blogger,Robert Bitos Gandia.
Robert is an avid cook (ono gandule rice) and always laughing!!
He works at Syngenta as a Research Associate.
Robert lives in Kekaha on Kauai's west-side and loves football!!



The Raffle Ticket

A woman arrives home from work and her husband notices she's wearing a diamond necklace. He asks his wife, "Where did you get that necklace?"

She replies, "I won it in a raffle at work. Go get my bath ready while I start dinner."
The next day, the women arrives home from work wearing a diamond bracelet. Her husband asks, "Where did you get the bracelet?"

She replies, "I won it in a raffle at work. Go get my bath ready while I start dinner."
The next day, her husband notices she arrives home from work wearing a mink coat. He says, "I suppose you won that in a raffle at work?"

She replies, "Yeah I did! How did you guess? Go get my bath ready while I start supper."
Later after supper, she goes to take her bath and she notices there is only one inch of water in the tub.
She yells to her husband, "HEY! There's only an inch of water in the tub."

He replies, "I didn't want you to get your raffle ticket wet."

Hana Hou, (Encore) Shared from Facebook...




Tuesday, January 6, 2015

"Dog for sale..." Obama Da Dog' (Source)



Obama Da Dog  was born and raised on the
 island of Kaua'i.She can be seen around Kapa'a  
town with her best friend, James "Kimo" Rosen.



Dog for sale

A guy is driving around the back woods of Montana and he sees a sign in front of a broken down shanty-style house: 'Talking Dog For Sale ' He rings the bell and the owner appears and tells him the dog is in the backyard. 

The guy goes into the backyard and sees a nice looking Labrador retriever sitting there. 
'You talk?' he asks. 
'Yep,' the Lab replies. 

After the guy recovers from the shock of hearing a dog talk, he says 'So, what's your story?'

The Lab looks up and says, 'Well, I discovered that I could talk when I was pretty young. I wanted to help the government, so I told the CIA. In no time at all they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders, because no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping.' 

'I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years running. But the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't getting any younger so I decided to settle down. I signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover security, wandering near suspicious characters and listening in. I uncovered some incredible dealings and was awarded a batch of medals.' 'I got married, had a mess of puppies, and now I'm just retired.' 

The guy is amazed. He goes back in and asks the owner what he wants for the dog. 

 "Ten dollars," the guy says. 

 'Ten dollars? This dog is amazing! Why on earth are you selling him so cheap?' 

'Because he's a liar. He never did any of that shit.

Hana Hou, (Encore) Shared From Facebook...






Monday, January 5, 2015

"Happy Anniversary Dakinetalk blog..." Kimo's world #51


James "Kimo"Rosen is a retired Professional Photographer living on the
Garden island of Kaua'i with his best friend Obama Da Dog.
HAPPY ANNIVERSARY DAKINETALK!

Kimo's World #51
Happy Anniversary Dakinetalk blog

I have published close to 1500 Dakinetalk blogs in the last 5 years.
Dakinetalk is starting it's 6th year! 

The first year it was all me, then in the second year Dakinetalk  teamed up with a few guest-bloggers. Teaming up with other bloggers was the best move for the ongoing popularity of the blog. 

Without the guest-bloggers Dakinetalk never would had lasted. I want to thank everyone who has ever guest blogged. I want to mention names however I am afraid I may miss recognizing someone, therefore this is a big Mahalo Nui Loa to anyone who has ever contributed to Dakinetalk.

Most important to the popularity are the many readers including you reading this right now.  There are days we reach 400-500 viewers, our average day brings in well over 200 views. This is not the New York times but we (Obama Da Dog and meyself) are proud of these numbers.

The most popular blog I  ever published with over 10,000 views was a blog I penned titled, "President Obama's sister." I believe the popularity is due to the name 'Obama' in the title, It comes up in many unrelated searches on Google and other search engines. 
http://dakinetalk.blogspot.com/2012/10/president-obamas-sister-obamas-dad.html

A  note to my fellow bloggers out there, try and have  popular words in your title of the blog. Therefore making it come up in unrelated searches thus  leading people that never would had read you, read you.

I was hoping to publish a book of the best of dakinetalk blogs but have decided if I cannot find a traditional publisher, no more self publishing.Self publishing to many is known as vanity publishing.
Anyone can pay $15.00 per book and try to sell them for 20.00.  Good luck!

I was hoping somewhere along the way someone would had discovered this blog and offered  a large ransom to compile a book of the best of dakinetalk.

This has not happened yet, however it  doesn't hurt to dream...

James "Kimo" Rosen High school senior portrait,1973.
back then everyone knew me as Jim Rosen or J.R.


This meme was used on Facebook to promote this blog!
P.S.
Blog #1, 'The Bus Ride From Hell' appeared on January 7, 2010 
http://dakinetalk.blogspot.com/2010/01/bus-ride-from-hell.html

The Bus Ride From Hell

The 11:00 o'clock bus had 2 bikes, two bikes is the maximum the Kauai Bus can accommodate, therefore I missed my bus, I did a few errands and waited for the 12:00 o'clock bus, my bike and I got on board this time in hopes of making it to the doctors office on time.

From Kojima store to Brick oven pizza a normal 10 minute bus ride took almost one hour.I started feeling nauseous, I had the drive heaves, the bus was literally at a standstill across from the Coconut market place, I asked the driver if i could please get off since I was about to loose my insides, she said it's illegal, I asked her if she would please call her dispatch, she complied and dispatch told her she could not let me off until the next designated bus stop at Brick oven pizza, which was a grueling 30 minute drive, something that normally is done in 2-3 minutes.

I pleaded with the driver to call back to dispatch, the driver called again and here is what dispatch told us, I could not get off unless we called emergency 911 and then it would had been a real mess in an already bumper to bumper traffic situation for everyone. Luckily I just had the dry heaves' but being on a bus in traffic, that is going at a snails pace and feeling sick as a dog with no fresh air, (since windows are not allowed to be open on the bus), is an experience I would not wish on anybody, unless of course that somebody is the person behind dispatch.
\
I never did make it to the doctors that day...

Hana Hou, (Encore) Shared From Facebook





P.S.S.

My high school senior portrait created quite a buzz on Facebook Timeline, check it out;