"The Three Samurai..." 'Chester "Unc" Lau' (Source)

Dakinetalks favorite Uncle (Chester Lau)

 Unc tells us about three Samurai he personally knew!

"Unc" is a retired cinematographer currently living 

on the Hawai'ian Island of Oahu & giving the politicians a bad time...

The Three Samurai

Once upon a time, a powerful Emperor of the Rising Sun advertised for a new Chief Samurai. 
After a year, only three applied for the job:  a Japanese, a Chinese, and a Jewish Samurai.
"Demonstrate your skills!" commanded the Emperor.

The Japanese samurai stepped forward, opened a tiny box, and released a fly. 
He drew his samurai sword and *Swish!* the fly fell to the floor, neatly divided in two!
"What a feat!" said the Emperor.
  
"Number Two Samurai, show me what you do."
The Chinese samurai smiled confidently, stepped forward and opened a tiny box, releasing a fly.
He drew his samurai sword and * Swish! * Swish! * The fly fell to the floor neatly quartered.
"That is skill!" nodded the Emperor.

"How are you going to top that, Number Three Samurai?"
The Jewish samurai, Obi-wan Cohen, stepped forward, opened a tiny box releasing one fly, drew his
samurai sword and *Swoooooosh! * flourished his sword so mightily that a gust of wind blew through the room.

But the fly was still buzzing around! In disappointment, the Emperor said, "What kind of skill is that? The fly isn't even dead."
"Dead ?" replied the Jewish Samurai. "Dead is easy. But, circumcision...?" 

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"Why don't we pretend we are married?" 'Robert Bitos Gandia' (Source)

 Guest-blogger,Robert Bitos Gandia.
Robert is an avid cook (ono gandule rice) and always laughing!!
He works at Syngenta as a Research Associate.
Robert lives in Kekaha on Kauai's west-side and loves football!!

Why don't we pretend we are married?

A man & a pretty woman who had never met before found themselves sharing a sleeping compartment on a train.

The man on the top bunk & the lady on the bottom bunk.

During the night, man woke & asked "Sorry to bother you but would you reach into the closet to get me a 2nd blanket, i'm freezing!"

"I've a better idea" she replied, "Why don't we pretend we are married?"

"Wow what a great idea!" he said.

"Good" she said,

"Get your own blanket yourself, you lazy bastard!"

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"Valentines Day..." 'Judith Whitehead' (Inspiration Sunday, on Friday)

Judith Whitehead  lives in Amherst, N.Y. and has
worked in the ophthalmology field of medicine for
over 30 years.

Valentines Day

I think Valentines day is a great American Holiday to Celebrate unless you are single and unattached.  

It always makes me feel bad that there are those that are left out of the made up Hallmark holiday. It is unlike Christmas and New years when a gift exchange can be made between family members or friends etc. but Valentines Day seems to single those out that are attached to someone.  

Unfortunately my father in law passed away one Valentines Day so it brought mixed feelings every year after that date...so we never spoke of that holiday again. One of my first Valentines gifts was from my back then boyfriend now my husband when I was 15 yrs old.  It was a very large stuffed dog  animal that I enjoyed and still have after all those years...no wonder my basement is so cluttered. 

 Most years my husband orders flowers for me and we exchange cards, go to dinner and promote the Hallmark holiday. When you have been married 39 years, there are only so many ways to celebrate...I think it is a holiday to be enjoyed by the young at heart or the young lovers out there and it is a way to boost jewelry sales and flowers. I have gotten about 20 e-mails from Pro Flowers saying last chance to order!! So for another year that has passed, Happy Valentines Day to all those who are in love, want to be in love and have fallen out of love. 

Treat yourselves to a nice dinner and enjoy; even if you are not attached to someone, you still deserve a nice evening out. 

P.S. Check out this video of Kama, the Hawai'ian surfing pig!
https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=635164253187433&set=vb.213812685322594&type=2&theater

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"Making it work wherever we are..." 'Bettejo Dux' (Classic Wednesday)

Bettejo Dux has lived  on the Cosmic island  Garden Islandof Kaua'i over 30 years. She is a weekly columnist in the local
newspaper (The Garden Island News) and is a published author
of the Novella "The Scam." Order your copies below.
www.bettejodux.com

Making it work wherever we are

Here’s a trick that’ll help keep you healthy, wealthy and wise: make it work wherever you are.

There are times, it seems, when everything seems to be falling apart at the same time. You set priorities, right? But what’s at the top of the list of priorities today, is at the bottom of the list tomorrow. The car has  a hitch in its get-along, the wind dropped a  branch on the roof and you've loaned the ladder to a friend who’s out of town- and which you shouldn't be climbing up in, anyway-and your handy man, men do come in handy, has the sniffles and a headache….

….on and on and on and on. You know the drill.

My approach to such chaos used to be: run in circles, scream and shout, tear my hair and flounce about.  Exhausting and a  waste of time. I took up solving the problem slowly. I don’t know about you, but I’m running a bit slower these days- darned if I’ll blame the years-so I took up skipping, lowered my voice, patted my hair and gave up flouncing. Flouncing  around in smelly sweats and mucky barn boots is  silly.  Flouncing was the first to go. Good riddance.

That skipping junk? Forget it. How do you skip in circles? Skipping out. Bye bye.

I’ll admit- once upon a lifetime- I used to kick the tires when the car misbehaved. Take that. And that.  Then I stubbed my toe.

That worked.   A comfy chair, a goof with  a view, bird chirps, and a hot cup of tea. Comfort that toe. “Have a long talk with  yourself,” I said. And a cookie. I’m  a cookie monster. As I sat there, the first time I tried this approach, the world- surprise, surprise- didn't come to an end.The problems didn't go away but the stress did. That hidden human dimension which bugs us all. How to deal with stress? Take a deep breath and make up your mind to have fun with it.

“Fun?’

Seriously. What is stress ? ‘To subject to physical or mental pressure, tension or strain.’ A useless pastime. Solves nothing. Just contributes to the problem. It’s that boogie man under the bed that, as a kid, you learned to get after with a broom.

Actually, the way it worked out, I decided to have fun solving the problem. It was, as it should have been along, a fun thing to do.

“Yeah? Well you’re broke,” my mind grumbled.”What’s the fun in that?”

“My Scottish blood loves to pinch pennies,” I answered.

“Pinch my foot.”

“Been there done that. Money problems are the worst…”

“You can say that again.”

“Money problems are the worst.”

“Are you trying to be funny?”

“Yep.”

“You’re not succeeding.”

“Have a cookie.”

“These are  crackers.”

“Crackers are funny.”

“Crackers are funny?”

“Crackers are funny.”

“You’re repeating yourself.”

“I ‘m talking to myself.”

“You can say that again.”

“I’m talking to myself.”

“You win,” small chuckle.

We made it work. It never fails.

P.S. you will definitely share this, it's a "pay it forward" type video, worth the watch!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qc8ZbVcdHpg

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"Kapa'a is starting to look like a ghetto-The Food truck revolution" 'James "Kimo" Rosen'

Food trucks are charging just as much or more than a sit down
 conventional  brick and mortar restaurant with the same type of food items...

This blog also appeared as my bi-weekly column
 in the Kaua'i Garden Island News on 02-10-14; 

Please click on the link below and hit recommend on the top right of column;
http://thegardenisland.com/news/opinion/guest/the-food-truck-revolution/article_3f77a0da-921a-11e3-9d72-001a4bcf887a.html

Kapa'a is  starting to look like a ghetto-The Food truck revolution

Imagine wanting to open a restaurant  and share your culinary art only to find rents for commercial restaurants on Kaua'i are a hard nut to crack, and in many cases cost prohibited without already being a person of wealth.  

Fast forward to Kauai 2014.The last few years on Kaua'i have brought us an array of all wakes of ethnicity in regards to street food by means of the 'food truck.'  There are Mexican, Greek, Italian, Thai, Chinese, American style steak and burgers, crepes,and the all  popular Hawai'ian style plate lunch, lau lau,shaved ice and malasadas.

Most people I know enjoy street  food.  Street food used to be sold by means of hot dog carts, pretzel stands and  musical ice cream trucks.

Food trucks have not only taken over for street food vendors, but  for the conventional restaurant  as a popular  means to open a restaurant on Kaua'i. Kapa'a town is starting to look  like a ghetto with all these old step-vans converted to food trucks. There is a food truck revolution going on.

Food trucks were originally known and famous for large portions of  food  at very reasonable prices.  Food trucks do not have all the overhead of traditional restaurants, while some pay minimal rent, others set up on the side of the highways and roads and pay nothing or a nominal fee to their local city or county. Food trucks  plain and simple do not have the expenses of a conventional restaurant.

The food trucks I have witnessed do not even have porta potties or  a place to wash your hands? It makes me wonder where the owners and employees relieve themselves during a shift of work. How can a restaurant pass a board of health inspection without restrooms for their patrons and employees?

Therefore one would think the savings in overhead would be passed onto the consumer, as I have witnessed on O‘ahu and many other places. I often visit a locally owned  restaurant  that has an excellent wait staff, awesome food, large portions and restrooms, plus their menu prices are less than the food trucks I have witnessed on island.   

The  food trucks I have visited on Kaua‘i are  priced way too high with tiny humble portions of food. Food trucks in many instances are charging more than a full fledged sit-down restaurant serving similar food items.

 There’s a relatively new food truck I  bicycle  by every day. However, after looking at the menu, it was the same old story, high prices.The only thing that looked reasonable was the kid’s menu; however, you must be 12 or under. Isn't that discrimination? 

 I understand being an entrepreneur and wanting to live your dream, and that dream may be to open a restaurant. You may not have the funds to open a  restaurant in a shopping mall, or you may just like the concept of food-trucks. However, when a burger plate is $12-15 plus tax served on a paper plate with no wait staff or restrooms-- and with  the audacity to have a rusted lid mayonnaise jar on the counter with sloppy handwriting that  says “TIPS.” This is just insanity. 

I want  the Kauai fleet of  food trucks to stay in business and make money. I would like to offer  some solid advise. Here's my tip, not in a rusted lid mayonnaise jar but from the heart. Please  serve larger portions, think volume and stop charging fine dining prices in a fast food environment.

Believe it or not the next fad in business is fashion trucks, they are gaining popularity in mainland markets. Who knows, before long there will be no need for shopping centers or strip malls in Hawai'i, just good old converted step vans everywhere.   Welcome to paradise! 

P.S.
"The Food Truck Revolution appeared in the 02-10-14 edition of the Kaua'i Garden Island News. If you like it please click recommend on the top right orbottom of page. The link is below. Hope you enjoy! James "Kimo" Rosen. AKA Jimmy, JR or Jim.
P.S. they even included my photo in the online edition!
http://thegardenisland.com/news/opinion/guest/the-food-truck-revolution/article_3f77a0da-921a-11e3-9d72-001a4bcf887a.html

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"The birth of the POTHOLE..." 'Judith Whitehead' (Inspiration Sunday)

Judith Whitehead has works  in the medial field of ophthalmology
for over 30 years. she currently resides in Amherst N. Y.

The birth of the POTHOLE

People who live in the colder areas of the country are well familiar with the pot hole...

This winter on the east coast, more than ever, since we have had a brutally cold winter with snow, ice and rain, the abundance of pot holes have increased tremendously.  No longer can one drive down any road and avoid them. They are the opening up of the road in any paved location that jolt the unsuspecting driver who comes upon them. There is no warning as they can occur in any location and will surely blow a tire out if they are too deep.  They will continue to widen in size and multiply until the Spring comes, whenever that is, and the pavers can do their repair work.  Until then... look out, drive slowly and believe no road will go untouched. 

 All roads  have damage this winter, it is a casualty of living in the colder climates...until Spring, bundle up and be aware....

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"The Kauai Electric Company-Cooperative or Corporation..." 'James "Kimo" Rosen'

James “Kimo” Rosen is a retired professional photographer living in Kapa'a
 with his best friend Obama Da Dog, Rosen also blogs as a hobby...

KIUC-Cooperative or  Corporation


The  real question for the local electric company is; why are they one of the highest priced electric utility company's in the country at approximately .42 cents per kilowatt hour?


 The lowest rates of electric in the country are in Idaho at  approximately .06 cents per kilowatt hour.  New York city is the highest priced electric on the mainland at  approximately .16 cents per kilowatt hour. Kauai is almost triple in rates of New York city, 'Holy Toledo Batman!'

This whole smart meter  extravaganza is only a diversion to high electric rates. The real disappointment is being taken to the cleaners. A person in Idaho who pays $40.00 a month for electric, would pay 7 times that if they lived on Kaua'i. They would pay $280.00 for what  would cost 40.00 in Idaho. 

The electric company would rather focus on  the few people who opted out of smart meters than  focus on being a cooperative, instead they are just the opposite, very uncooperative. KIUC should be called , Kauai  Island Utility Corporation.

The Garden island news  reported in 2008,"the owner of Kojima’s grocery store in Kapa‘a, Glen Kojima, said the high cost of electricity keeps him from being able to hire new employees.
He said people are dumbfounded when he tells them what he has paid monthly — more than $20,000, or 12 percent of his sales, at its peak in 2008 — to keep his small market cooled and lighted."
http://thegardenisland.com/business/high-electricity-costs-drain-energy-from-local-economy/article_47b1f0d4-71a6-11e1-a6a3-001871e3ce6c.html

Who cares if you have a smart meter or an analogue meter. Who cares if you use a smart phone, laptop, desktop or Ipod computer. Who cares if you ride a bike or drive a car? Who cares if your vegetarian or a carnivore?Who cares if you want a dairy farm or not on Kauai? The real question should be, why did we need to vote either way on smart meters verses analogue? The special ballot cost members yet another $100,000.

If smart meters were so smart the calculations would had figured a way to make everyone happy and save  customers  money. Many complain of their privacy being invaded with smart meters, however as a recent commenter in the Garden island news pointed out, having a meter reader come onto your property once a month is more invasive than a smart meter.

True smart technology would be to convert everyone one on a tropical sunny island to solar and save millions a year in fossil fuel. True smart technology would be no high salaried CEO's.

True smart meters would tell us were not gonna take it from the utility company,airlines and oil companies that continually keep us addicted on oil related resources while there are healthier alternatives available.

Electric cars powered by solar panels,  like my friend Doug in California utilizes would rid people of oil addiction. Solar panels on every home and business on our tropical paradise could make us Independent of the electric utility company. An alternative  public transportation system to get us off island like a ferry service would reduce airfares and  the monopoly of the airlines that service the Hawaiian islands.

Imagine if smart meters were actually smart and could solve  the recession, put an end to barking dogs, feral cats, leaf blowers and all noise pollution. Now imagine they could end overpriced airfares, traffic congestion, racial tensions, corrupt politicians and drug abuse!

The only possible way to get through this electric price gouging monopoly is with a little electric  comic relief; 
Q: What is an electrician's favorite ice cream flavor?
A: Shock-o-lot!
Q: What would you call a power failure?
A: A current event. 
What Thomas Edison's Mother might have said to her son:
"Of course I'm proud that you invented the electric light bulb. Now turn it off and get to bed!"

Sign on on the side of the electrician’s van – “Let Us Get Rid of Your Shorts”.

Smart meters just need to be re-programmed to replace human politicians  and we would  all live happily ever after, now that would be smart!

With all the smart technology, I guess were not really not that smart after-all.

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